


Not all broken

by Magic_fate



Category: Original Work
Genre: Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Be Careful What You Wish For, But the heart's desire comes through, Choices, Developing Relationship, F/M, First Meetings, Freeform, Implied Sexual Content, Mutual Pining, POV First Person, POV Second Person, Uncontrollable Outcomes, Wish Fulfillment, Wishes that don't come true, contractual relationship, impossible choices, prose, reader - Freeform, shattered hearts - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-21
Updated: 2017-08-21
Packaged: 2018-12-18 09:41:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 783
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11871669
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Magic_fate/pseuds/Magic_fate
Summary: A genie and a lamp. No, that's not the story.





	Not all broken

**Author's Note:**

> But, dear, how sweet you look to me kissing the unreal:
> 
> comfort, fulfill yourself,
> 
> in any way possible — do that until
> 
> you ache, until you ache,
> 
>  
> 
> then come to me
> 
> again.
> 
> -Rumi

"What happens when you are given wishes?" No, not wishes, only  _ one _ . Then it's a choice.

 

A choice. A guarantee. A mockery.

Will you be the next Anna Karenina? Or Lev Tolstoy?

You can't have everything, you know. Take a rhyme, and give it reason. Add it to the rhythm of your life.

 

_ I always thought people with blue eyes see the world differently, in lighter shades . _

 

What does your life need most right now?

 

Please, inspiration. Money and control. Or use resin to fill in my cracks. You can't have one without the other, and how to get all three without screwing yourself over thrice more?

 

_I'm really happy_ , you breathe.

_No one is_ , gasps a reply.

You take it regardless.

 

Muttering.  _ You are not the most broken person in the world. Neither is she. Though she's more broken than you are. _

 

I stutter.

 

 _ Look closer at her and you can see the cracks behind the ever-breaking smiles, shattering her body, branching out and around. She will shatter  _ you,  _ too . _

 

'One day you look back and everything feels good. The good with the bad. Every event causes happiness.'

 

A smile, forced and stretched. 'No. It doesn't. 

Does that come at the end of life?'

 

'No. It doesn't.'

 

                                                                                       

 

The way wishes work is that you can't wish for what you want. Because you're afraid. Of wasting a wish, of it coming true.

The way a choice works is that.

You make it. The lesser of two evils. You can't just cast the choice aside. You choose the safer, wiser option. Money and a semblance of control.

'Remember your resolve', the voice smiles.

_ I do _ , I think.

 

And it comes.

 

Small waves, at first, then a tidal wave all at once. Followed by another, greater one. And a third. Unpredictable but consistent in its unpredictability.

The amounts never get smaller and the occurrences only get more desperate.

Your resolve is breaking.

You can't save yourself, never mind her.

Maybe there's a trick to this?

Maybe I don't have to. [take the money]

Maybe. Maybe. Maybe my conviction is not crumbling. Maybe it's not my mind that's convulsing.

 

You  _ liar _ . What does not suit you? This is everything you asked for. An open door to a steep slope with no exit. Drop in anytime!

 

                                                                                       

 

I miss you-when I'm with you-you're not here-my breath leaves me-I'm all alone.

I miss you when I'm with youwhen I'm with you you're not hereyou're not here my breath leaves memy breath leaves me I'm all alone.

 

I'm all alone.

                                                                                       

 

 

And you watch her break.

      And you don't want any of it anymore.

            And you refuse the money but it latches to your back where you cannot remove it because you are  not  an accepting person.

 

I love to dream of you being happy. Not play-acting it. God, I wish you would play-act utter misery but be happy.

            Do you know what it's like?

Did you ever feel it,

just once in your short life?

You don't look it.

 

I don't look it.

 

 _I_ am an artist, _I_ go through life feeling. Now that I'm finally  ** rich **  (though not as rich as you, no. Never.), I found my  _ artistic soul _  and I reject the money and control that I once - in exchange for far smaller payments, gave up each and every one of my freedoms for - and I  _ feel _ .

And I break my own rules I created for my own protection. I create new ones, bendable ones, so that it doesn't feel as much of a breach when I break them later. [for you]

 

An inadequacy on my part. Not your fault. You have too many of them anyway. You say you do. I can see your cracks and. [I can't help you]

[Help me too]

 

                                                                                       

 

It's not real. It's a fake name. An alias. Put it all under my name and one day you will discover I'm not real.

'Yes, if that's what you want.'

'Will you look at me?' A glance of crystal quartz, scattering light and rainbows at all odd angles.

'Yes, if that's what you want.'

                                                                                       

 

I made my choice. My resolve broke almost immediately; frustratingly, funnily so.

I gave up my control willingly. Might as well have given up the money, too, though I'm a ghost and ghosts can't spend money so it makes no difference. I made my safe, wise choice (for money, protect yourself, always. No one else will. Put yourself before everyone and don't ever ~~never~~ trust).

I got a wish that I didn't make instead. For you. A heartbreak of exquisite porcelain. I was never delicate. Yet we both break, every day, together. But that's what genies do.


End file.
